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Tash is Aslan! Aslan is Tash! Get that into your heads, you stupid brutes!

The (non-Catholic) British blogger who goes by the nom-de-plume Archbishop Cranmer gives us this little gem to demonstrate just how far things are already gone in some sections of the former Christendom, and of course how much further they could go.

Advent-cum-Mawlid: church holds joint birthday celebration for Mohammed and Jesus

December 4, 2017

Mawlid (or Milad) is the Islamic festival commemorating the birthday of Mohammed. The only thing it has in common with Christmas is that it isn’t actually the day the celebrated baby was born. Yet All Saints Church in Kingtson upon Thames thinks there’s an interfaith syncretised opportunity to be found in holding a joint birthday celebration for both Mohammed and Jesus – so they put the flags out for both, rejoicing in both, eulogising both, solemnising both, glorifying both, honouring both…

We have been here before: when Westminster Abbey hosted a service in which Mohammed was named in the succession of prophets, they effectively proclaimed to the world that Mohammed is greater than Jesus:

In Islamic theology, Mohammed was ‘The Prophet’ who came to fulfil and complete the partial revelations of all preceding prophets. Muslims believe that his coming was prophesied by Jesus: ‘But when the Comforter is come, whom I will send unto you from the Father, even the Spirit of truth, which proceedeth from the Father..‘ (Jn 15:26). The ‘Comforter’ or ‘Advocate’ (NIV) whom Christians believe to be the Holy Spirit is, for Muslims, Mohammed. So when he is declared in Westminster Abbey to be ‘The Chosen One’, it is not simply a benign multifaith expression of ecumenical respect in a commemorative service of reconciliation: it is a dogmatic affirmation of a perfected prophethood to which Jesus is subordinate,

and His divinity thereby denied.


To all of which I can say little that is more poignant than this exchange:

“Please,” said the Lamb, “I can’t understand. What have we to do with the Calormenes? We belong to Aslan. They belong to Tash. They have a god called Tash. They say he has four arms and the head of a vulture. They kill Men on his altar. I don’t believe there’s any such person as Tash. But if there was, how could Aslan be friends with him?”

All the animals cocked their heads sideways and all their bright eyes flashed towards the Ape. They knew it was the best question anyone had asked yet.

The Ape jumped up and spat at the Lamb.

“Baby!” he hissed. “Silly little bleater! Go home to your mother and drink milk. What do you understand of such things? But you others listen. Tash is only another name for Aslan. All that old idea of us being right and the Calormenes wrong is silly. We know better now. The Calormenes use different words but we all mean the same thing. Tash and Aslan are only two different names for you know Who. That’s why there can never be any quarrel between them. Get that into your heads, you stupid brutes. Tash is Aslan: Aslan is Tash.”

You know how sad your own dog’s face can look sometimes. Think of that and then think of the faces of all those Talking Beasts–all those honest, humble, bewildered birds, bears, badgers, rabbits, moles, and mice–all far sadder than that. Every tail was down, every whisker drooped. It would have broken your heart to see their faces.


They’re Anglican, of course, so it doesn’t strictly matter. They really are much weirder than you imagine. I went into a very ancient church in Chester once, that had of course been stolen by the apostates when all that happened, and they had set it up so there was a sort of coffee bar in the nave. One side aisle had been retained as a “worship space,” conspicuous for the assemblage of microphones and guitars. In the vestibule a nice Boomer-Lady gave me a coat check number and a little recorded guide to the architecture. In the 10th century it had been the main diocesan church in that monastic town, and had been updated to the latest style of interior decorations in the early 15th century, and retained much of artistic interest.

Anyway, these Anglicans in Kingston All Saints Church are of that kind, it seems, and judging from their website have more or less adopted leftist politics as their creed. They’re that new kind of Anglican church where no one who is still a believer in Christianity would ever go, so it double-doesn’t matter.

Except, of course, that it does.

If you would like to express your concerns in a polite email or phone call, here is the contact information for the “church” in question.

All Saints Church, Kingston All Saints Church, Kingston

Call +20 8546 5964

or email


2 thoughts on “Tash is Aslan! Aslan is Tash! Get that into your heads, you stupid brutes!”

  1. Heminarian says:

    Great headline. As crazy as it sounds to a Catholic, it makes total sense — if you’re a Modernist.

    Pope St. Pius X writes: “given this doctrine of experience united with that of symbolism, every religion, even that of paganism, must be held to be true.” Like the Ape says, “the Calormenes use different words but we all mean the same thing.” To the Modernist, “You know who” never reveals Himself to man. Rather, a religious experience emanates from man, an experience of “You know Who.”

    But then Pope St. Pius X asks, “What is to prevent such experiences from being found in any religion?” Nothing obviously.

    So … “On what grounds can Modernists deny the truth of an experience affirmed by a follower of Islam?” No grounds obviously.

    “Will they claim a monopoly of true experiences for Catholics alone? Indeed, Modernists do not deny, but actually maintain, some confusedly, others frankly, that all religions are true” (Pascendi Dominici Gregis).

    “Aslan” and “Tash” are just different symbols denoting the same You know Who experience. Therefore, Aslan is Tash, and Tash is Alan.

    What’s so evil about all this … it sets up a no-win question: “Hey, Catholic, you’re not going to claim a monopoly on religious EXPERIENCE now, are you?” But that’s not what the Catholic claimed: he didn’t claim that his EXPERIENCE, and only his experience, was true. He claimed that You know Who made a definitive revelation of Himself, that revelation, and the salvific plan that goes with it, is the Catholic religion, and only the Catholic religion.

    So when it comes to religious experience — no monopoly (frankly, Catholics don’t care). But when it comes to revealed religion, absolutely: there’s a monopoly, and it’s the Catholic faith.

  2. Bosco49 says:

    “Motus in fine velocior”

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